Letter 06: Dear Mind! I’m Drowning in Thoughts Again

Some days, you're sad for no reason. Your mind won’t stop running — but you’re aware. And that awareness? It leads to questions. This was one of those days

Dear Mind,

Drowning in thoughts again, are we?

Thoughts of people — who never made me feel safe.
Thoughts of situations — that always left me uncomfortable.
Thoughts of scenes — that never happened and probably never will.
Thoughts of the past — that I can’t change.
Thoughts of the future — that no one can predict.

But why?

Why do we still think about people who made us feel small?
Why do we want them to like us?
What are we trying to prove?
Why does their “I’m proud of you” still mean so much?

Why do old situations still trigger us?
Why do thoughts of the future creep in like warnings?
And why not the present?

Why don’t we ever stop to ask — What am I doing right now?
What can I do to make today feel a little better?
Even when that thought comes, we let it slip away so easily. Why?

These are the questions that hit me hard on lonely days.

When I feel like I’m drowning, this is how I try to swim —
I float with these thoughts. I don’t fight them.
I sit with them. I ask.
I keep questioning myself, just to get some clarity.
And I keep reminding myself — one step at a time, dear mind.
One step at a time.

It’s not easy. Not even close.

To accept that you’re hurting.
To admit there’s something you can’t fix.
To carry the pain quietly because you know others might not get it.

And still — even with all this self-awareness —
you can’t always control your thoughts, or calm your heart.
It’s exhausting.

But there’s one thing I’ve realised — something only personal experience taught me:

Understanding someone else’s pain takes experience.
You won’t truly get it unless you’ve felt something similar.
Empathy is born through suffering.

And I guess that’s where we come in — you and me.

Maybe feeling so deeply has made me softer. Kinder.
Maybe it’s made me the kind of person who doesn’t look away when someone else is struggling.

So if we can’t escape it today, dear mind —
Let’s just stay with it. For five minutes.

Not to fix anything.
Not to solve it.
Just to notice it.
To sit with the feelings — with full awareness — even if it hurts.

Maybe healing doesn’t begin with answers.
Maybe it begins when we stop running from the questions.

Always,
D